This blog post has been insipred by other blog posts.
The Pity Train was heading to the pity party but has just derailed at the intersection of Suck It Up Rd. and Move On Ave. The cause of the crash was due to a man standing on the tracks eating his waaaaaamburger with a side of french cries. A waaaambulance was called to help the injured but it was delayed due to the fact that we all have problems.
Any complaints about how I operate can be forwarded to 1-800-waa-waaa. If you get placed on hold please enjoy the lovely music performed by the worlds smallest violin.